Forget the Auto Industry, Let’s Save Pornography!
I’m wondering if maybe CNN is playing a practical joke on its readers. It isn’t April Fool’s Day, so I guess it must be true: Hustler publisher Larry Flynt and the infamous CEO of Girls Gone Wild Joe Francis are petitioning Congress for a $5 billion dollar bailout. The reason? “‘People are too depressed to be sexually active,’ Flynt said in the statement. “‘This is very unhealthy as a nation. Americans can do without cars and such but they cannot do without sex.’”
I’m a pretty big fan of sex myself and am quite aware the effect depression has on one’s sexual libido. However, does government funding really need to be allocated to the PORN INDUSTRY!? Last I heard, porn was a multi-billion dollar industry. Come on, Larry & Joe, I know you’re probably trying to be cute. Maybe you’re even attempting to make a point about the fact that “billion dollar bailout” was the “weapons of mass destruction” of 2008. Or, most likely, you’re just really fucking greedy. Either way, I hope that Congress ignores this ridiculous petition.
Let’s take a minute to review why exactly Hustler and Girls Gone Wild are the last companies the government should be funding:
Would it be the exploitation of under-aged and intoxicated girls on Joe Francis’ videos? Would it be the fact that Hustler, just like Playboy, is one of those magazines that feminists like me are always harping about? You know, because they feature photo-shopped skinny women and inundate men with the idea that real women have double-D’s and lie around all day masturbating for men’s pleasure, not their own. Maybe it’s because Joe Francis himself should be in jail for rape, among many other crimes (check out this article Harlequin wrote a few months ago, and this expose on Francis in the Los Angeles Times for more information).
The thought of the government shelling out taxpayer’s dollars to these companies enrages me. Luckily, I doubt Congress will give this petition much thought; they do have far more important things to discuss – the conflict between Israel and Palestine, Barack Obama’s new administration, and so on. I’m pretty sure our Senators and House Representatives don’t really care if our men (and yes, the majority of consumers of Girls Gone Wild and Hustler are men, surprise, surprise) have their porno mags and $9.99 videos of drunk girls taking off their clothes.
Read the full article here. If your blood isn’t boiling yet, just read this: “Flynt and Francis concede the industry itself is in no financial danger — DVD sales have slipped over the past year, but Web traffic has continued to grow.” What’s next? Hollywood asking for a bailout because all those damn teenagers are downloading their movies illegally? Microsoft asking for some loans because they are being slaughtered by Apple’s Macbook?
What are your thoughts?
- Dollface
Flynt doesn’t want Congress to give him the money. That’s his plan.
When they deny him the $5B he will file a lawsuit, take it to the Supreme Court, and is going to win. Larry Flynt knows more about the U.S. Constitution than the vast majority of our Congressmen, which means that he’s aware of the fact that the U.S. federal government is constitutionally bound to provide equal protection to all individuals.
Since corporations have been ruled to be “individuals” under the 14th Amendment, Flynt will argue that the 14th Amendment “equal protection” clause guarantees him (and indeed *all* Americans) a bailout if GM and AIG are also receiving percentage-based bailouts.
And he’s going to win. Just watch.
OMG, I saw this yesterday and my FIRST thought was that first article I read at RLG on GGW! And I was like, oh fuck, dollface better write about this.
So thnx for perfectly expressing my anger. Cuz, seriously, this pisses me off so much (though, when I looked at the comments on CNN that seemed to be the consensus). How about a $5 billion bailout for all the frigg’n people who are losing their jobs right now and can barely afford the groceries each week? These guys are fucking sexist too–they’re just perpetuating this myth that all men think about is sex and that they *need* to have their porn to be happy and that any actions they take *cough rape cough* are because of their biological needs. And, as you pointed out, this is totally male heterocentrist, with no attention being paid to women’s or homosexual men’s desires. I just don’t understand our world sometimes.
PS Is that meat grinder pic supposed to be Flynt’s idea of a joke? Cuz it’s pissing me off. I’d love to smash their faces in the ground.
PSS You perfectly expressed all the problems with this. I’m just regurgitating rage now. ;)
this makes me sick.
@ Jes — Interesting theory. I hope it doesn’t get that far!
@ Dolly — Haha I’m glad I wrote this too. I was really happy when I saw the comments on the CNN article — most people agree this is ridiculous.
Don’t you just love that Hustler cover? Gahhhhh
@ mermaid — Me too.
I agree with Jes – it’s pathetic and horrible, but he’ll get the money somehow.
The cover of hustler is so incredibly disgusting. They are implying that they don’t want to hang up women like pieces of meat. Yet, the picture displays a contrary direction. They are shredding her and that is displaying her as a piece of meat!
I think the porn industry bailout is sick just as sick as the auto industry bailout. Any bailout is sick. If something is failing it is failing for a good reason. Like the auto industry and the damage it has even done to its own city, Detroit as well as the destruction it has done to the planet. No to use a car metaphor but it is time to shift gears.
I completely agree, Cecelia (p.s. I love the car metaphor)
Flynt and Francis are trying to make a point. It’s not about the money; it’s the principle. Jes somewhat touched on this – Why should GM or AIG or anyone else get a bailout, but not them? What makes certain corporations worthy of help and others unworthy? They shouldn’t get to choose based on ‘taste’ or ‘morals’. While I can’t say that I love Larry Flynt or agree with him on everything, I so respect and appreciate what he’s done in regards to the First Amendment.
@ Lilith — Interesting viewpoint. Now that I’ve gotten over my initial dismay I’m inclined to agree with you that they are trying to make a point. I don’t really agree with the bailouts either, since I find it to be a problematic way of approaching the problems in our economy (if you give out money to one corporation, why not the next?) I think the main reason why the govt shouldn’t give money to Flynt & Francis is not because of morals but because they admit their respective companies *aren’t* actually in jeopardy.
If people where not buying this stuff these guys would be out of business so it seems to me that if you don’t want look at porn or use sextoys – just click away.